It's hard...

Here's something I've learned:

Moving as a single person involves some stress.
Moving as a couple involves more stress.
Moving as a couple with children involves the stress of the two above times A LOT.
Moving to another country, with children involves A LOT of stress plus some more and then a few semis full dumped on top of that... 

We figured it was going to be stressful.  We aren't that naive.  I don't think we had any concept of what this was going to be like for us or for the kids.  Any concept..

Here's what I've noticed about myself:

• I can't fall asleep at home.  It takes hours and hours.  
• My faith is growing by leaps and bounds.  
• I am fatigued most of the time.
• I can't be bothered to do my hair.  I - can't - do - it.
• My patience is VERY high for my children's needs, but VERY low for anything else (especially dumb people - sorry, there are dumb people)
• My emotions are all over the place.  "What is this water coming from my eyes???"
• I obsess about the weirdest things. Lists and lists of things to do, things to take, things...  Gosh, I hate stuff.  I keep making sure we have enough stickers and fun workbooks and GF baking flour (just got a 25lb bag.. seriously??).
• I no longer care if my children match (clean yes, matching no).
• My body is out of whack..  (that's all I'll say)

Here's what I've noticed about A:

• He's tired.  He can fall asleep anytime/anywhere. (yes, this makes me bitter)
• He stays out of my way unless I ASK for help. (I don't do that well..)
• He is much more "big picture."  I am much more "detail, detail, detail."
• He needs routine.  
• His faith is growing by leaps and bounds.
• He spends a lot more time on ESPN.com.

And then... there are the kids.  I couldn't have predicted how much this move would effect our kids.  Until this move, their world was a fairly predictable, well planned, low chaos place.  We have lost predictable. We've lost routine.  We slammed right through the door to chaos' house... 

• They don't want to be at home anymore, they're done with my seemingly constant packing, organizing, cleaning, purging. 
• Every emotion is HUGE (they've always been highly sensitive, but this is off the charts).
• They go from 0 to 10, there's nothing in between.
• They want to be a part of EVERYTHING I do.  I can't stress this point enough...  there are times where they are both sitting on the rug when I step out of the shower. 
• They get what's happening.  I overheard M talking to a little boy in the check out at Toys r Us the other day: "We're moving soon.. to Qatar.  That's in the Persian Gulf.  It's a long way away, but we'll be back to visit."  The kid couldn't have cared less, but M was proud to give the information. 
• They are clingy.  Let's just say if I could wear them in a baby carrier again, they would totally go for it.  I was holding P on my lap the other day, she looks up at me and says, "Mommy, I NEED you to HOLD me!"
• They don't like being apart (the family being apart).  We've been spending weeks in MI this summer helping out with my nieces and getting time away from the house.  On our way up here last week, P broke down (mommy had tears too), "I need Daddy!  My heart is breaking without him.."  Lots of crying.  I felt awful...  We had a long talk about all of us getting on the plane together, riding together, arriving together.. you get the picture. 
• They don't want to sleep alone.  We've bounced around a lot (understatement) in the past few months and they are not about to all asleep in their own rooms alone.  I imagine when we do arrive in Qatar, there will be weeks (months) of sleeping adjustment: thankfully we home school.
  
  Honestly, while this period is hard and the growth that is taking place is HUGE for all of us, it will only benefit us (especially the kids) in the long run.  They are learning (very quickly) so many lessons that will help them later in life. 
  
  I'm pretty sure that it will get worse before it gets better, but I sure hope our transition to life in Qatar isn't as long or hard as our transition out of here.  Those of you who have done this.. don't tell me if I'm wrong ok?  Let me believe (for now).
  

Semi trucks of stress...